Eeyore Remains Eeyore
In a previous post about inspiration porn, I identified a Tumblr resource called realsocialskills.org. I found their latest post to really speak to me about people with disabilities that are not so obvious or people with mental illness. It got me thinking about an argument I read on Facebook pointing towards the same issues.
If someone has depression, your presence or your friendship doesn’t take away that depression. You are not a catalyst for improving or curing someone and you shouldn’t hold expectations of such. Looking at Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh really helps me to remember this way of being a friend. Pooh and Piglet and Rabbit invite Eeyore to all of their activities without trying to change him. They like Eeyore for who he is and not for what he could become with their help. They don’t get frustrated that their invitations to do fun things don’t help Eeyore liven up. Eeyore doesn’t need to change and he doesn’t need to just have someone to empower him to move beyond his circumstances.
Even I have to remember this sometimes, I have to remember that there are differences between people born with disabilities and people who acquire a disability later in life. We have to be mindful of the struggles of others and not put expectations ahead of enjoying the company of others. You accept people for who they are now and you work around their limitations or whatever circumstances they are dealing with but you don’t get to try and cure them or save them.
I highly recommend subscribing or bookmarking realsocialskills.org
http://realsocialskills.org/post/136885378817/ableist-hostility-disguised-as-friendliness